Trinity Bible ChapelTrinity Bible ChapelTrinity Bible ChapelTrinity Bible Chapel
  • Jesus
  • About
    • Service Times & Location
    • Our Mission
    • Our Four Pillars
    • Our History
    • What We Believe
      • Our Doctrinal Statement
      • Specific Issues
        • Baptism and Communion
        • Church Government
        • Church Membership
        • Church Planting Philosophy
        • Church Structure
        • Counseling Philosophy
        • Creation, Evolution and God’s Sovereignty
        • Eternal Security of the Believer
        • Sufficiency of Scripture
        • Spiritual Warfare
        • The Trinity
        • Women in Ministry
        • Worship
    • Church Staff
    • Job Opportunities
    • Contact Us
    • Privacy Policy
    • Project Rehoboth
      • Rehoboth Updates
    • King Alfred Academy
  • Connect
    • New Here?
      • Welcome to Trinity!
      • What Should I Expect?
      • How Can I Be Saved?
      • Get Baptized
      • University Bus Shuttle
    • Get Connected
      • Step 1: Connect
      • Step 2: Consider
      • Step 3: Commit to a Small Group
      • Step 3: Commit to Serve
      • Step 4: Covenant in Membership
    • Resources
      • Weekly E-News
      • Events Calendar
      • Church App
      • Subscribe to Our Podcast
      • Pulpit Curriculum
      • Bible Reading Plans
      • Weddings
  • Ministries
    • Trinity Kids
      • Parenting Resources
      • Web Protection Guide
      • Parenting Conference Audio
    • Trinity Youth
      • Youth Ministry Blog Posts
    • Small Groups
      • Pulpit Curriculum
      • Small Groups Blog Posts
      • Accountability Resources
    • University Bus Ministry
      • Adopt-A-Student Ministry
    • Worship Ministry
      • Family Worship
      • Weekend Song List
    • Sunday Support
    • Evangelism
      • Evangelism Videos
    • King Alfred Academy
  • Sermons
    • Latest Sermon
    • View All by Date
    • View by Series
    • View by Preachers
    • View by Topics
    • View by Scriptures
    • Subscribe to Our Podcast
  • Blogs
    • The Pastor’s Blog
    • Trinity Ministry Blog
  • Give

The Pastor's Blog

By Jacob Reaume

The Pastoral Porn Letter

By Jacob Reaume | July 10, 2014 | Leave a Comment |
Tagged: lust, porn, pornography, sexual immorality

Dear Friend,

It was good to talk to you Sunday. Thank you for your transparency and how you expressed desire to rid your life of sexual immorality, especially in the form of pornography. I wanted to write you to hopefully raise the level of urgency in how you approach this. 2 Corinthians 7:10 distinguishes between godly grief and worldly grief. My concern is that you have only experienced worldly grief over pornography, not godly grief. I believe this because you continue to dabble with the forbidden, even after discussing this with me several times in the last few months. This sin will kill you (Proverbs 5:1-5). You are throwing away your life by giving “your honour to others and your years to the merciless” (Proverbs 5:9). If you had already experienced godly grief, you would have done whatever it takes to put the pornography behind you in repentance.

During our chat, I sensed that you may be having trouble distinguishing between struggling with lust and participating in sexual immorality. Lust is sin, but it is different than participating in sexual immorality. Sexual immorality always stems from lust, but lust does not always lead to sexual immorality. Sexual immorality is the actual acting out on sexually lustful desires. The sexually immoral will not inherit the Kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 6:9), and they will be thrown into the lake that burns with fire and sulphur (Revelation 21:8). The consumption of pornography is sexual immorality, and those who consume it are sexually immoral. It is the possession of the forbidden intimate knowledge of another, and it is the sexual objectification and exploitation of a divine image bearer. When you observe pornography, you engage in a predatory sexual act upon a person who bears the image of God. It is outrageous behaviour. It is not a joke.

My fear is that too many men treat accountability like a Roman Catholic confessional. They tell their small group they stumbled, feel a sense of absolution, and then repeat the cycle week after week and/or month after month. The idea is that you can consider yourself a good and godly Christian as long as you keep confessing the sin of viewing pornography. After all, confession displays honesty and humility, right? Think again. Obedience is the ultimate display of honesty, humility, and faith. Scripture calls us to repent. That means change your ways, now. Those who do not repent have nothing for which to look forward, except a fiery judgment. Read Hebrews 6:4-8. Jude verse 7 presents Sodom and Gomorrah as an example of what will happen to those who claim God’s grace as an excuse to continue in unrepentant sexual immorality – that is they will burn forever. There are people in our church who think they are Christians, but who may hear, “I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness’” (Matthew 7:23) on the Day of the Lord.

An added motivation for you, I think, is your relationship with your wife (or for some your future wife). It is unacceptable to present yourself as a pure partner in that relationship, while finding sexual gratification and experiencing intimacy with nameless women on a computer screen. You are only cheating her by engaging in sexual acts with others. These are real people you are looking at and engaging with sexually, even if they remain unknown by name to you and you to them. Viewing another’s nakedness for sexual purposes is an intimate act, always. I doubt you would be willing to pursue a relationship with a Christian woman if you found out she was exposing herself online to anonymous men and simply confessing her “stumbling” week after week to her small group. I wonder if you would even consider her to be a Christian.

The problem is that too many have become too comfortable with pornography and have simply dismissed it as something that all people struggle with. That may be an error with eternal ramifications.

So my friend, I am writing because I love you and am pleading for you to do whatever it takes to repent, and then “bear fruit in keeping with repentance” (Matthew 3:8).

Jesus will forgive your sins. He will cover all your transgressions. He died for sexually immoral people. And He wants you to live in holiness. I want you to live in holiness. The Church will be stronger if you live in holiness. Jesus will receive glory as you pursue holiness.

How do you repent? Start first of all by praying God grants you repentance. Beg Him to give you repentance. Get on your face and plead for repentance so that you will not be like Esau who “when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no chance to repent, though he sought it with tears” (Hebrews 12:17). I think you will find a good resource in Finally Free by Heath Lambert. Start by reading that book and doing everything it says. Once you are done reading it, we can talk. I want to sit down and talk this through more with you. I want to help. But I want to see more from you than confession and a desire for weekly and monthly absolution. Jesus commands you, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand” (Matthew 4:17).

I really hope you sense my heart in this. I am for you, and I am communicating the urgency of the situation. It is treated too lightly. Many assume that because many men struggle with this it is not that bad. I suspect the grumbling cow worshipers had similar thoughts as they rebelled in the desert. That is wrong. “For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few” (Mathew 7:13-14).

I love you my friend.

Pastor Jacob


SHARE


Comments

Related Posts

  • A Gay Bar with Free Math Lessons

    By Jacob Reaume | June 15, 2022

    I have been advising parents to pull their children from public schools for several years.  The primary objective of education should be to foster Christian virtue in the hearts of children.  Apparently this view was once shared by the majority of Ontarians to the point that they had it enshrined in law.  Section 264.1.c ofRead more

  • Protect Your Children from Public School

    By Jacob Reaume | June 9, 2022

    A few months ago, I reported (here) of a Waterloo Region public school teacher who the WRDSB chair censored at a board meeting.  Her offence?  She questioned whether school officials should be teaching children that hormone blockers are a good idea.  She did so while quoting a public school library book that presented hormone blockersRead more

  • Wisdom in Evangelizing Your Children

    By Jacob Reaume | May 17, 2022

    The following is adapted from a short sermon I gave at a child-dedication service on Mother’s Day. Introduction Many think that there is a recipe to get your children into the Kingdom of God.  “Maybe if I just protect them enough from the world they will be good,” some may reason. The problem is thatRead more

  • John Bunyan Opposed Church Attendance Limits

    By Jacob Reaume | May 12, 2022

    Just over a year ago, the Province of Ontario seized our church building and charged me, along with all our elders, with contempt of court for the second time.  The Province, claiming to be acting in the public good, had set limits on church attendance, and we had no regard for them.  We, ourselves claimingRead more

  • Property Rights, Free Enterprise, and God’s Law

    By Jacob Reaume | April 21, 2022

    Early in the first COVID lockdown, I had quickly publicly opposed the mandates, and in April 2020 someone criticized a post I made.  The individual said that we should be doing our part to save society from COVID just as our ancestors did their part to save society from the Nazis in WWII.  I tookRead more

Newer Post

Top 5 Trending

  • A Gay Bar with Free Math Lessons

    June 15, 2022
  • What does “makes her commit adultery” mean? (Matt. 5:32)

    October 25, 2018
  • Protect Your Children from Public School

    June 9, 2022
  • Yes, Bruxy Cavey Is A False Teacher

    July 11, 2018
  • The Shame of Waterloo Region Public Schools

    January 18, 2022

Latest Posts

  • A Gay Bar with Free Math Lessons

    June 15, 2022
  • Protect Your Children from Public School

    June 9, 2022
  • Wisdom in Evangelizing Your Children

    May 17, 2022
  • John Bunyan Opposed Church Attendance Limits

    May 12, 2022
  • Property Rights, Free Enterprise, and God’s Law

    April 21, 2022

About the Author

Jacob Reaume

Born and raised in Guelph, Jacob holds a Master of Divinity from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, Kentucky. He became pastor of Trinity Bible Chapel in August, 2009. Jacob is married to his high school sweetheart, Joanna, and together they have six children.

CHURCH LOCATION
Address:    1373 Lobsinger Line
Waterloo, ON, N2J 4G8

Phone: 519-658-6333
Email: info@trinitybiblechapel.ca

NEW HERE?

  • Service Times & Location
  • Welcome to Trinity!
  • What Should I Expect?
  • How Can I Be Saved?
  • University Bus Shuttle
  • Our Mission
  • Our Doctrinal Statement

OUR MINISTRIES

  • Trinity Kids
  • Trinity Youth
  • Small Groups
  • University Bus Ministry
  • Worship Ministry
  • Sunday Support
  • Evangelism

GET CONNECTED

  • Step 1: Connect
  • Step 2: Consider
  • Step 3: Commit to a Small Group
  • Step 3: Commit to Serve
  • Step 4: Covenant in Membership
  • Get Baptized
  • Events Calendar
Trinity Bible Chapel on Rumble
Copyright © 2022 Trinity Bible Chapel
  • Jesus
  • About
    • Service Times & Location
    • Our Mission
    • Our Four Pillars
    • Our History
    • What We Believe
      • Our Doctrinal Statement
      • Specific Issues
        • Baptism and Communion
        • Church Government
        • Church Membership
        • Church Planting Philosophy
        • Church Structure
        • Counseling Philosophy
        • Creation, Evolution and God’s Sovereignty
        • Eternal Security of the Believer
        • Sufficiency of Scripture
        • Spiritual Warfare
        • The Trinity
        • Women in Ministry
        • Worship
    • Church Staff
    • Job Opportunities
    • Contact Us
    • Privacy Policy
    • Project Rehoboth
      • Rehoboth Updates
    • King Alfred Academy
  • Connect
    • New Here?
      • Welcome to Trinity!
      • What Should I Expect?
      • How Can I Be Saved?
      • Get Baptized
      • University Bus Shuttle
    • Get Connected
      • Step 1: Connect
      • Step 2: Consider
      • Step 3: Commit to a Small Group
      • Step 3: Commit to Serve
      • Step 4: Covenant in Membership
    • Resources
      • Weekly E-News
      • Events Calendar
      • Church App
      • Subscribe to Our Podcast
      • Pulpit Curriculum
      • Bible Reading Plans
      • Weddings
  • Ministries
    • Trinity Kids
      • Parenting Resources
      • Web Protection Guide
      • Parenting Conference Audio
    • Trinity Youth
      • Youth Ministry Blog Posts
    • Small Groups
      • Pulpit Curriculum
      • Small Groups Blog Posts
      • Accountability Resources
    • University Bus Ministry
      • Adopt-A-Student Ministry
    • Worship Ministry
      • Family Worship
      • Weekend Song List
    • Sunday Support
    • Evangelism
      • Evangelism Videos
    • King Alfred Academy
  • Sermons
    • Latest Sermon
    • View All by Date
    • View by Series
    • View by Preachers
    • View by Topics
    • View by Scriptures
    • Subscribe to Our Podcast
  • Blogs
    • The Pastor’s Blog
    • Trinity Ministry Blog
  • Give
Trinity Bible Chapel